Talking to you…My mother’s closet 10/28/19

Beside her bed,

Behind a lanky

Door

Perched love

On every shelf.

Stepping in and

Pulling the string

I can still feel the tension,

And then

A deep click and grind,

Illuminating life.

Squatting in the corner

Filling the entire space

Alone,

Sitting cross legged as

Time ceased to move.

No one bothered to find me there

Entertained by all her treasures,

I felt so entwined.

~~~

A lifetime of memories

No longer.

Replaced,

Unwanted

The smell of her gone

Overnight

She died…and then again.

Her memory’s scent

Closed promptly behind

Her closet door.

The last visit

Disregarded

Not knowing

Where to go

To feel close to her.

I could not breath in,

The smell,

Was no longer hers.

~~~

Her story weft

In and out of my soul.

Broken, cutoff

Pathways to her

Interrupted

Creating a chasm

So deep

I no longer had a way

To access

Or touch

What I needed to heal.

~~~

A restless feeling

Sits in the pit of my gut,

Ever since.

No way to digest

So I hold on

And embrace

The only thing I know

That’s been left behind.

To sit and wallow

With the trinkets

Stored in my memories

That was once

My mother’s closet.