For the past year-ish, I have been sharing very sparingly what I write because, well to be honest, I think it’s crap. I am not being honest with myself, and I feel it in every word that I force out on the paper. I have recoiled a bit into myself…
I made a big leap and shared my blog with my dad and my brother. Hoping desperately to open the doorways of conversation. I’m afraid we have been silent for all too long. The mountains of shame are perilous peaks none of us know how to climb. My dad made one comment to me over the phone, something like your mom loved to write. That was nice, but I kinda already knew that.
I have been floating back and forth between children’s picture books and DoRee, and that has proven to be a very hard head space to hold. I love both, it is exactly where I want to be. I was stuck in a loop thinking how much they don’t fit together, and then a few days ago I read something a fellow blogger wrote to me. It opened my mind.
“You see, when I read it I feel something warm inside me; it’s like hearing your proper voice.”
She was referring to the picture book I wrote, Many Greetings, Many faces. And I was like, huh. Thinking…lots of thinking. Yes! The voice you hear in that book is me! It’s the ultimate silly, quirky, playful voice that lives deep inside. A voice that’s always been there, and somehow is still there. All while life has been busy building layer upon layer upon layer on top. That’s DoRee, all of the layers.
Over here, outside of my blog-o-verse I don’t let many people see the DoRee side of me, partly because I never understood how to make sense of all these conflicting feelings being housed in the same space (my heart). And if I couldn’t make sense of it, how could I expect someone else to.
What this one little sentence did for me, was immense. One little thought shared by, let’s be honest, a stranger (thank you forever and always, Olga), allowed me to merge two parts of me I had held apart for so long. It helped me to understand and accept and love them both at the same time. For the first time there was no pit grinding in my stomach. Just dancing: silly, and quirky, and serious, and sadness. It’s all ultimately love!
Look for the ladybugs, and be kind to yourself.
DoRee MelNic 
I reached out to this post, and it’s always rewarding to hear another writer’s voice. Thank you for sharing the link to your book.
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Thank you so very much for your kind words!!! 🥰
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Utterly speechless. It totally got me by surprise to read your post today. I have to be honest, I wasn’t expecting to read the name when I began to read your words, and still felt like I was syncronising with everything your were saying there. Then I stopped at the line you quoted and got startled. It’s the truth, Doree-Reed💚 What I said about your book came out from my heart; I felt it like that completely, and I now feel so immensely happy to see you there, doing what you are doing. It’s witchcraft perhaps but I was just thinking of you this morning when I was taking a picture of some tree branches and their tiny leaves beginning to sprout. I loved your post today, I just loved it; it did helped me so much, you can imagine my dear friend. Thank you with all my heart 💚Go for it🌿🌺
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I am absolutely certain, this journey called life we are on wouldn’t be the same without finding each other in this realm. I am so grateful for that. For all that you have shared, and shown me through your art and your words. I am different because of it, better. Much love and appreciation, beautiful friend. ❤️
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