Talking to you…Nice to finally meet you 8/3/19

So far, I’ve mostly let you piece me together, or make up your own mind. Sometimes creating someone else’s story is so much more fun. So, if you’re satisfied with what you know, I’d stop reading this post now. But if curiosities killed the cat, then here we go…

I am not good at owning the real me. The good with the bad, and the ugly. I needed an outlet, to express my twenty-eight year old grief, feelings, emotions, or all of the above. And life too, I love life, most days. But I wasn’t ready to be real with myself or anyone close to me. So, I created this blog. It allows me to be as anonymous as I need, and still feel naked and vulnerable. Because traveling through grief is such a big part of what I write about, I took my mom’s name and my name and came up with DoRee MelNic. Ode to us, tied together forever. I was 11 when she died, and too young to claim a voice of my own. As I grew up, my voice was hushed, or I never found it. It ends up, I took whatever voice I did have and turned it internal. Let me tell you, oh what a storm that created. EF5, easily. Send in FEMA!

About two years ago, everything finally caught up to me. Life has a funny way of doing that. My oldest daughter hit the same age I was when my mom died, and I instantly began to realize all of the things I missed with my mom, and my mom missed with me. A few months later, I out-aged my mom. It’s weird to be experiencing things she never got to experience. It’s been a mixture of emotions between, I don’t deserve to, yet I am so thankful to. How does one reconcile those conflicting thoughts? I’m still working on it.

There is much more that happened in the middle twenty-eight years, between then and now. A lot of my poems/writings speak to dealing with those emotions, my storm, and it’s aftermath. Something exciting, I finally feel, is that the storm is over. However, now I am left cleaning up the mess…and it’s big. To be exact…Over two-hundred separate posts (in about a six month time period) and counting. Plus some more stuff on the side…

Thank you so much, to those of you who have taken the time to read/comment/like my living testimony to how losing someone close can deeply affect and continue to affect you for your entire lifetime. This blog and you have proven to be a big part of me sorting through everything.

My name is Reed, nice to finally meet you.

14 thoughts on “Talking to you…Nice to finally meet you 8/3/19

  1. Reed, it is a pleasure to meet the woman behind Doree’s blog. There is a special connection between morhers and daughters. I have seen it with my mother and grandmother as well as with my wife and her mother. While these relationships continue as a memory today, even after several years . . . both my mother and wife miss their mothers. You have been given a gift, and your relationship with your daughters is precious. Thanks be to God!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s amazing how grief has a way of connecting people in a way that few things in this world can. It’s not an easy journey, no matter how much time has past. I lost my mom just over a year ago, and I can feel through your heartfelt words how painful your own journey has been. Wishing you peace and sending hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are so right grief is universal and will happen to us all. Thank you for your kind words, and my heart hurts that you lost your mom too.

      I don’t know if you’re on Facebook, and I’m not sure how old you are (you look younger than me 😉), but I just came across a page motherless daughters when young (0-30). If that interests you, you should check it out…it’s private.

      I checked out your blog, and your doggy is super cute :)!!

      Thanks so much for stopping by :).

      Like

  3. It is wonderful what you say. Grief is definitely universal. Perhaps one of the emotions we are supposed to experience. We’ve all lost our dear one. I lost me parents. These voids aren’t fillable. But life deals a hand which we have to play. Your talk is very good

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your kind words, you are right we all are destined to feel these feelings at some point. A path to connection, to really experience humanity. I am so very sorry for the loss of your parents. I believe it is one of the deepest sorrows a human can feel. ♥️

      Liked by 1 person

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