I have a lot of time, on days like today. My eyes get blurry and unfocused when they have to pump me full of medicine to stop the reaction from the other medicine. So, I annoyingly drift between sleep and awake. Seven hours to be exact. The nurse that visits when the pump needs to be adjusted quickly becomes a close friend of mine. I talk about things, she might not care, but I keep talking, and I don’t care. Then, as she turns blurry too, I give in and close my eyes. The duplicate cube next to me has a pump that is going off every few minutes, pulling me back into my thoughts. There was rain and thunder all afternoon, and I had a wall of windows. But, for some reason I didn’t look out much. I didn’t want to be there. And when my time was up, the nurse pulled the needle’s catheter out of my arm hard. Starting with a quick yank on the clear tape that held it in place. I looked up at her and said badda-bing, badda-boom. She smiled and didn’t say anything. I got up, and gathered my things. Almost forgetting my phone, until she dryly said, “don’t forget your phone”. I took that as my hug goodbye. I picked up my phone., gave a short, “oh yeah, thanks”. She said, see you in six months. Both of us knowing, we probably won’t.
Oddly enough, there is something I deeply enjoy in days like these. Oh yes, time…all we have is time.